I started an Instagram account last week.
This is my 3rd attempt in 3 years. Every year I try and then drop it. After lots of encouragement from my friends, I decided to take a deep breath and go for it. Social media is tricky for me, as I know it is for most of you.
It’s like this weird, compulsive pull.
But I do like seeing my friends and family as they move through life. I’ve missed that, these past few years.
And you know when they suggest people to follow? A writing prompt popped up, so I followed that group and decided to write about the prompt ‘Resistance’.
A poem emerged from my heart. And what came out astounded me. I’ll share it with you below.
But what came out was about accepting what’s right in front of me and loving it, embracing it, being present with it.
Most of my life, I feel like I haven’t ‘arrived’. Like I’m always bustling just to get to the next…..whatever it is that I think it’s supposed to be.
Once we get ‘through’ the pandemic. Once I move to a new city. Once I get to paddle board everyday. Once I get to exercise everyday. Once I can sleep soundly through the night. Once I’m fluent in French…..and the list goes on and on. Can you tell I’m a Gemini?!
Resistance, to me, is about resisting life. Resisting what’s here and now. Messy or beautiful. Sad or happy. Full or empty. Alone or surrounded by people. Whatever it is, is.
And I’ve resisted feeling and experiencing what’s right here and the gifts that I have right now. And, once this writing emerged and I re-read it, I feel my heart melting and the walls of resistance dropping and letting in the love and the abundance and the health that is there.
You might equate this with gratitude.
And I’ve focused on gratitude but I’m acknowledging the resistance that I didn’t know was there, keeping me from letting the current moment just be. And I’ve noticed, just in these past few days a softening, and acceptance and love. And the things that I felt were lacking or generating annoyance, those things are dropping away. And I feel myself smiling more.
What are you resisting? Are you resisting the love that’s in front of you from your family? Your significant other? From your co-worker?
Are you resisting that you have a beautiful life and you can breathe, in contrast with all of the health concerns that are worrying and cause for fear?
Are you resisting the self-love? The nature, trees, birds, sunshine, rain that is there for your own enjoyment?
Can you take a moment to check in with yourself and feel where those areas of resistance might reside?
Here’s what I wrote and I’d love to share it with you……
When I’m not sure which steps to take
Because my destiny hasn’t unfolded that far out
And I want it to be faster than we’re ready
When I push against what’s not there yet.
When I resist what’s beautiful and sitting right in front of me
but I don’t see it
Because my ego just won’t let go and the words in my head are too loud and I resist
the beauty and the love and the gift
and the person in front of me
When I resist melting into the life that is set out in front of me but I don’t think
that’s what it’s supposed to be because I didn’t envision it that way.
But it’s here.
And can I open my eyes and open myself
up to my life. Without resisting what is.
This is it.
This is it.
Open up truly and fully.
Non-resistance is the key
to a fulfilled life.
Without the control
Without the fear or
the other adventure that I may have missed out on.
Because my full presence, my whole will, my whole heart
can melt into this adventure.
The one of me watching the chubby neighbor cat, from my office window, sitting on the front step hoping to sneak into my house
The messiness of watching my best friends’ depth of heart-broken-ness.
The one with me showing up day-after-day and lift myself up when I feel like the life I envisioned hasn’t happened yet.
Or maybe it’s happened without me knowing because I was too busy waiting for it to happen.
May you feel the love of the world flowing through you. May you feel whole and healed. May you continue to elevate yourself and create circles of healing to the world around you.
Always, in healing,
P.S. I just wanted to share something that one of my email recipients sent me. I LOVE hearing from you!
Photo courtesy of Google Images