Hi friend,
As we move into the holiday season (yes, this year has flown by with unbelievable speed), I’m reflecting on how I want this season to be for me and my family…..and then, of course, this gets me thinking about how our culture really spends the season and what the general consensus is.
I love giving and receiving gifts: it’s a beautiful way to acknowledge how we feel about the people in our lives. However, with all of the gift giving, I’ve realized how much of the ‘Christmas Spirit’ (and I’m speaking for myself here but feel free to chime in if you feel the same) is about just that….the shopping, wrapping, delivering and opening of gifts. In fact, I feel that the entire month of December is all about the acquisition of said gifts and the opening of them on December 25th.
I’m not feeling inspired to buy another boot, shoe, electronic device, or sheet set for my kids, because we’ve done all of that the last few years. There’s really nothing inspiring to do anymore. I certainly don’t need more stuff either. Our cabinets, closets and drawers are overflowing (you’ll find me organizing my linen closet this holiday season).
Don’t get me wrong….I absolutely love gifting….I’m not Grinchy about all of this….I just want to spend my time doing alternative activities that aren’t going to drain my bank account or my life force. The driving, shopping, and crowds just aren’t doing it for me. Call it being in my 50’s and perimenopause, but I don’t want to fight traffic and the overheated stores to buy something that I’m feeling compelled to do because society is silently pressuring me to do it.
I’ve had this conversation with a few moms, and I think that we’re feeling like this: we all have everything we could possibly want …..except that bathroom remodel, the trip to Kenya, and a fully funded retirement. Our kids pretty much do, too, and if they don’t, we all usually just click on our favorite shopping app and have it delivered pretty quickly to cover the missing item.
This year, for my heart, my energy, and my joy, I’ve decided, along with a couple of other families, to help support a couple of people, that we personally know, who are working really hard to better their situations but just struggling a lot. These are folks who are showing up, working hard, doing all the right things, and but they’ve just been dealth a rough hand in this life. These aren’t people who are complaining about how hard life is….they are young people, going to school, trying to get out on their own, away from unhealthy living situations, and we want to support their efforts.
Another one of my patients, who works in the healthcare field, says that she’s doing the same thing. Instead of giving money to organizations that help people below a certain income level, she put an email out to her department and asked for anyone who could use a little extra help over the holidays. She said that a few people came forward. And this is the same scenario: people who have jobs, who are working hard, but still having a hard time getting above the line to enjoy more of life.
I love this.
I feel the same way….there are a lot of people who don’t necessarily qualify for social services because they ‘make too much’ but aren’t making enough to really get ahead. This year, these are the folks I’m excited about giving to.
The reason I’m sharing this?
I’m ready to think outside the box this year. I’m feeling differently than I normally do. Blame it on the 60 degree weather we’re still having here and the green leaves still hanging onto the trees in my neighborhood, or the economy, or the uncertainty of what’s going on in the world, or that my kids are now officially adults or that I know how much suffering there is out in the world…..or how many people just need to be seen.
Whatever the reason, I’m challenging myself to find something new to do….while I honor and love the people close to me, I want to bring some light and cheer to some others who may have felt abandoned or alone.
Is there anyone in your life that could use a bit of extra cheer? Whether it’s a warm jacket, a new set of sheets, a blender, a gift card for groceries or a little time out of your week to treat someone that could use some friendship to a tea?
There are infinite ways to show love, appreciation, kindness. It’s easy to do it for the people that we love and are close to us. Is there anyone or any entity (organization) where you could show some unexpected love?
One of my favorite movies is the 2000 ‘Pay it Forward’ with Haley Joel Osment and Helen Hunt. If you haven’t seen it, it’s a heart-warmer. One good deed inspires another good deed, done by a stranger, and so forth. No paybacks, no acknowledgements. Just for the sake of doing good and the ripple effects and love that it inspires. Now, more than ever, I feel that it’s entirely appropriate and needed to pay it forward to strangers, friends, and co-workers.
I can’t wait to hear from you about your creative ways of giving to those outside of your orbit!
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In the nature of giving, I want to say a huge ‘thank you’ for being along this journey with me. Whether you’ve come in to see me or have brought a family member, or you’re out in the world, I love you. I appreciate you. You matter!
Yours in Health,
Dr. Arjan
